SURPRISE!!!
Christmas Day, wrapped up in the biggest box I could find I handed the Mr the first of my gifts of the day. Inside on a white stick was my joy and excitement, entwined with panic, fear and the traumas of the past. The final piece to our puzzle. Baby number three was on their way.
Whole heartedly I can say that I feel truly blessed to once again being able to carry another baby. My journey to motherhood has never been an easy one. So for this my fifth and final pregnancy bringing two babies into the world and one on the way has been some of the most painful experiences I have ever had to endure. For the fifth and last time my pregnancy has been overshadowed by the ugly world of HG and all that comes with it. HG for me means months of feeling as if I have severe food poising, vomiting 20-30 times a day with no let up. HG is not being able to keep down the simplest of things like water, retching until all that comes up is bile. It takes over my whole life and the life of my family. HG is countless visits to the hospital to be hooked up to an IV, being so dehydrated that finding a vain can take up to half hour. It’s loneliness even with a full house, it’s throwing up at the sight of certain colours. HG has such negative effect on my life and my pregnancy along with my incompetent cervix and the feeling as though I would die. I would be lying if I didn’t admit that thoughts of abortion didn’t cross my mind on more than one occasion.I can say with all of what I have gone through with all of my babies I am thankful that I stood strong. I’ve conquered HG for the fifth and final time. I keep telling myself BIRTH is powerful, FEAR is normal and I am STRONGER than I knew!I Couldn’t of done it alone, I thank the most high that I have the most supportive partner to ever grace this earth, and a fabulous mother I could have been blessed with.
My depleted focus and energy started to push Clarke’s Closet into early maternity leave or so I thought! Now I’m on the other side. One stitch at a time, a new creative energy I thought had been sucked dry by everything pregnancy had thrown at me, was and is being ignited. My new bundle of joy is now cooking safely. New products are being created and some old favorites with a touch of magic have been sprinkled back to life and into my beautiful brand. I’m so excited to show you want I have been working on. Everything is going at a slower pace, I’ve got a few gems up my sleeve and I hope they’ll bring you as much joy, laughter and warmth as it has for me.
Love and Light Village
Jodi xoxo